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the dilemma

As an introverted leader, you face a dilemma. I face it too. Every day.

How do you balance your need for introvert time with putting yourself and your message into the world?

When these things are out of whack, it can lead to introvert-exhaustion.

in•tro•vert-ex•haus•tion
noun

1. a state of extreme mental, physical, and emotional fatigue brought on by too much time “in the world”.

2. the action or state of using up an introvert’s energy reserves completely.

You know what I’m talking about, right? You spend a day going from hour-long phone call to lunch with a friend to a coffee date to more phone calls, without breaks, and at the end of the day you feel spent.

When I feel that way, I’m usually tempted to spend a day on the couch watching cooking shows and surfing the internet on my laptop. But this can lead to the cycle of doom.

The cycle of doom: Facebook->email->worrying about what I should be doing instead of->email-Facebook->…

The problem with this is that it seems like it is “introverted” and we think, therefore it should be restful.
Continue reading “the dilemma”

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Why self-care & rest are so important.

I spent last week in Sonoma, California, working as an assistant at a leadership retreat (the first of four retreats that are part of the CTI Leadership Program).

IMG_0194

So basically, I moved chairs around, manned the video camera, and sat in the back of the room quietly observing and “holding space” for 6 days.

When I say it like that, it doesn’t sound like very much. But the truth is that “holding space” means staying completely present and open-hearted. And energetically being there in the room with the leaders and participants as one-by-one they were transformed and busted open. For 6 days.

That takes a lot of focus and energy. I didn’t realize how much until I got home.

On Sunday evening when I got home, I was still riding high and I talked Dan’s ear off. But I woke up on Monday feeling like I had been hit with a ton of bricks. And then Tuesday, I felt like someone had shattered the bricks with a sledgehammer.

In other words, I was spent. Tired. Exhausted. Pooped.

So I’ve had to let go of the big plans I had for this week and just… rest.

And I re-learned the importance of good self-care and making time to recover. That’s what this week’s video is about.

Links & stuff about Introversion & HSPs (in case you want more info):

Let me know in the comments below what you do to recover when you are bone-tired? And also, how easy or hard is it for you to give yourself that time? (that is, do you feel guilty or selfish? And if so, why?).

P.S. This week’s post is later than planned (Wednesday is usually my post day) because I didn’t plan for my rest & recovery & self-care the way I should have. Live and learn.